My father had finished all 3 chemotheraphy and he will go for tissue transplant. Im worried coz I have zero knowledge on that.
During the very first chemo
On second chemo. Notice the hair loosing? 
After 3rd chemo. Skinny DaddyFriday, April 27, 2007
Chemotheraphy
On second chemo. Notice the hair loosing? After 3rd chemo. Skinny Daddy
Sunday, April 15, 2007
This is painful enough
So many things happen to me recently. I consider those as things that people would not prefer to have.
A month after my father has been diagnosed of having cancer, an urge came to me asking me to have a full body blood test. Lo and behold, I got thalassemia trait in my blood and I am considered of having minor thalassemia which may also cause me to have bipolar disorder. Not just that, Dr said my immunity to Hepatitis B is ZERO. Why? I dont remember I skipped any vaccination on Hepatitis.
That just only on my blood. I got fibroadenoma too. Went for my operation and I realized that im a type of "tak tahan sakit". It was a minor surgery, but yet i felt like im dying. I hate when the Dr inject me with the anesthetic dose. It was too many and too hurry and too painful. I was thinking whether my veins are broken or not.
I hate the feeling when I realized from anesthesia, my throat was choking, hardly coughing, couldnt breathe, my body was shivering badly for about 15 minutes and my mind was thinking "am I dying?", trying to remember what had happened, where was I, what was the time, where's everybody that I know.
It was sad, coz I went there for surgery alone. I was afraid like hell and from there I knew, I am not strong. Apart from prayers of beloved ones that i brought together to the OT, nobody was physically available to support me. Not until 10 minutes after I arrived back to the Day Care Unit. He was there standing beside me, asking me to sleep and couldnt take his eyes off of me. Thank you.
Pain + Sad = Vulnerable. I was sick the whole day (and nite) after the surgery. Drowsy. Vomited few times.
Since my father got the cancer, commotions occurred few times between the family. I had the feeling that this happened coz The Man of The House is not able to wear The Pants anymore. Man and ego. Inseparable. He is weak but still wanted to do everything that he could no longer do which lead to lil' chaos among us. A very uptight situation for me which involved me into an accident on 6 Apr.
Though these happened, I learnt few more things that make me wiser inside. The only person that you can ask for help is YOUrself. When nobody around you can offer a helping hand, you have to be strong. When you got to do it, you got to do it!
I also learnt that being ignorance is the most stupid thing you can do when it comes to own self. Just by having the thoughts that your illnesses would go away automatically, wont help your heart stop pounding hardly whenever your wicked mind trying to figure out what has happened to yourself.
A month after my father has been diagnosed of having cancer, an urge came to me asking me to have a full body blood test. Lo and behold, I got thalassemia trait in my blood and I am considered of having minor thalassemia which may also cause me to have bipolar disorder. Not just that, Dr said my immunity to Hepatitis B is ZERO. Why? I dont remember I skipped any vaccination on Hepatitis.
That just only on my blood. I got fibroadenoma too. Went for my operation and I realized that im a type of "tak tahan sakit". It was a minor surgery, but yet i felt like im dying. I hate when the Dr inject me with the anesthetic dose. It was too many and too hurry and too painful. I was thinking whether my veins are broken or not.
I hate the feeling when I realized from anesthesia, my throat was choking, hardly coughing, couldnt breathe, my body was shivering badly for about 15 minutes and my mind was thinking "am I dying?", trying to remember what had happened, where was I, what was the time, where's everybody that I know.
It was sad, coz I went there for surgery alone. I was afraid like hell and from there I knew, I am not strong. Apart from prayers of beloved ones that i brought together to the OT, nobody was physically available to support me. Not until 10 minutes after I arrived back to the Day Care Unit. He was there standing beside me, asking me to sleep and couldnt take his eyes off of me. Thank you.
Pain + Sad = Vulnerable. I was sick the whole day (and nite) after the surgery. Drowsy. Vomited few times.
Since my father got the cancer, commotions occurred few times between the family. I had the feeling that this happened coz The Man of The House is not able to wear The Pants anymore. Man and ego. Inseparable. He is weak but still wanted to do everything that he could no longer do which lead to lil' chaos among us. A very uptight situation for me which involved me into an accident on 6 Apr.
Though these happened, I learnt few more things that make me wiser inside. The only person that you can ask for help is YOUrself. When nobody around you can offer a helping hand, you have to be strong. When you got to do it, you got to do it!
I also learnt that being ignorance is the most stupid thing you can do when it comes to own self. Just by having the thoughts that your illnesses would go away automatically, wont help your heart stop pounding hardly whenever your wicked mind trying to figure out what has happened to yourself.
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